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Why do people point at their wrist while asking for the time? I know where my watch is PAL, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do people say "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
What about people who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote becausey refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually!?!
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale
When people say "it's always the last place you look." Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and WHERE are they!?!?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
When people say, "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came would I be standing here, Dumbass?
When something is "New AND improved!". Which is it? If it's new then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new...
When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone can possibly do! What can you do that's longer?
Why do people say while watching a film, "DID YOU SEE THAT?". No, Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.
